Blinks (The "Laughin' Weather" Edition)

"It's laughin' weather today!" This is what I thought as I woke up this morning, shoulders hunched under the weight of a pressing urge to inject a good dose of joviality into the world. I rolled out of bed, whistled my way into my robe, poured some coffee, opened up a blank window, pushed my Barbra-Hershey-in-Hannah-&-Her-Sisters morning hair back from my face, and sat with hands poised over keys, waiting for the words to flow out through my fingers. Hilarious, gut-jiggling words. Dorothy Parker caliber prose. And I sat. And I sat.

And then I realized that I have absolutely nothing funny to say.

So! So, instead, I link to those who do have something funny to say. Who, in fact, make me laugh on a regular basis. You could call this A Very Special Episode of Blinks, only in my version, no one gets addicted to speed pills or goes to the back of the bicycle shop to watch cartoons. I do hope, however, that it warms your heart.

• Wiki wiki
  Sarah Brown on everyone's favorite time suck. You should also know that Sarah has a book out: Cringe: Teenage Diaries, Journals, Notes, Letters, Poems, and Abandoned Rock Operas. If you ever harbored a serious crush on Eddie Vedder and wrote bad poetry about it, or even if you are embarrassed to be married to someone who would ever admit to such a thing, then this is the book for you.


• cafe platitude
  Evany IS dazzling!


• Do Not Leave your Camera on the Plane
  Antonia survives Heathrow's lost property. Finally I reached a desk. A sign said: "Ring for attention. Please be patient as we may be busy going through your suitcase and putting your panties on our heads." A rotting human ear hung at the end of a string. I rang.


• Wii just want you to be happy
  We should all fear technology that tells us how to live. I'm looking at you, talking intersections.


• one instance in which LOL might have been useful
  I have often envied Jess and her posse of ice-bucket wielding friends. Especially in situations such as these.


• Guaranteed Morrie
  Three guys (who may or may not have had much access to daylight as children) and their microphones.

Go. Read. Listen. Otherwise you'll just have to suffer through another long-winded description of something interesting I saw on my bus ride into work, like that big blue rusted-out rear-windowless van with an old-fashioned horn on its roof, cages on the windows, and a mysterious little fan pointed at the passenger seat. You know, to keep the kidnappers cool. (See? Not funny.)

© Zan McQuade. All rights reserved.